Helping Randoms

Today I was walking on my usual walk. I was thinking about how my family is growing up, especially my little brother and sister.

I was about 3/4 done through my walk, turning a corner, when I saw it. It was a continuous stream of water ejecting out of a broken sprinkler head. It wasn't super exciting. So anyway, I decided that I should tell the home-owners that they had a broken sprinkler head. So I did.

It felt quite good telling them. I considered for moment passing by their house and not ringing the doorbell to tell them. It was for the best that I did, however. Especially with the knowledge of my own room recently ruined from a flooding of water, I was sensitive to their peril. If I were in their shoes, I would have been very grateful.

As I walked away, I felt that I had done something good. If I were in a video game, I would have gained some experience points of goodness. Conceivably, what I achieved and gained by giving them that useful knowledge was a feeling of inner satisfaction: mental, social, and spiritual satisfaction. So it was a selfish endeavor, but it was good for both parties.

Problemas del dinero

Money, have mercy.

I've been thinking quite a bit lately about how I'm going to pay for school. I will have to take out student loans, which gives me a really, really dissatisfying taste in my mouth. It makes me pretty frustrated and, frankly, angry. It is the central pillar of stress in my life right now, always looming on the horizon. If my bank account was a pillar, school is going to be a storm which will knock the pillar down (and subsequently crush me underneath its weight). The pillar just isn't big enough to withstand the storm of expenses.

Which brings me to the thought that the storm's intensity continues to grow every year. Tuition, rent, books, all the stuff that students have to pay for. It is all just growing, and it is global warming's fault. Or the crappy economy. Or both. Or, really, when you get down to it, the fault of adults who are still children. Adults who make stupid mistakes and ruin lives at the national and international level. Or just evil adults who are trying to ruin people's lives. ISIS and warlords and stuff.

Mostly it's my own fault. I wish I could blame impending debt on others, but I should look at my own mistakes first: 1) Quitting my job for another, more terrible job (summer sales). 2) Not searching as vigorously as I should have for a job this Summer and last Summer. 3) Spending my time and money on random, unnecessary items. Point three is a lesser pecadillo of mine when compared to peers' poor spending habits; but still, spending adds up. 

So my lack of funding for an education, while not absolutely at a critical point (lots of students my age are covered in mounds of loan and credit card debt), is still bothersome and ominous. I don't like it, plain and simple. I wish I could change it. I wish I could have money. I wish to not worry about it; that would be prime.

Money 

Money

Money

Money

Money

Money

Such cruelty.